Wedding Day

Ok, so this day picks up where last night left off. We were at the bar for some considerable time after midnight. For the traditionalists out there, I guess it was technically the wedding day and I shouldn't be seeing my bride, but she wasn't in her dress yet, so I don't think it counts.

Anyway, we made our rounds to everyone in the band to say hey & great show & later. We make our exit and we go our own ways. Well, this is when the night starts to get weird. Since we were still dressed for the rehearsal dinner, of course I was in my patten leather dress shoes that were part of my Class A uniform. Well, they are not exactly new, I bought them in 1997 at Ft. Gordon, GA during AIT. I guess I either had too much fun or I discovered the end of their lives in a very odd way. As we were walking out the door, I start walking with a limp. The heal of my left foot broke away and there was only a little stub left that I was walking on. Well, needless to say, by the time we got to the car, my left foot had resorted to just the balls of the toes as the sole was just falling apart on each step I was taking. By the time we made it to Ray's house to call it a night they were still not done yet as I found some more of my shoe in his car. So, we get upstairs and I take them off and evaluate the damage. Both shoes' soles were broken. There were three separate cracks from left to right in the area of the ball of my foot and the heals of both shoes were disconnecting from the shoe. At this point, I thought I was having a bad night.

Well, that opinion changed shortly there after. Ray & I were just bullshitting around, hit the topic of the Wii and decided to try playing. Well, this didn't last long because my phone began to ring. It was Angel. They were locked out of her parent's house, they were sleeping like rocks (not responding to the door or door bell), and I had the key to the house. Ray & I drove over there and let them in the house. This was about 2:45 if I recall correctly.

What an interesting day this has already turned out to be. So, we call it a night.

The next morning was quite a surprise. Ray was able to wake me up with out any physical contact or ice. Well, this much is going well already. Ray ran to McDonalds while I jumped into the shower. By the time we scarf down some breakfast, people are showing up. The additional participants for this morning's activities include Jason Beighel (Best Man), Dan Lebak (cousin), Josh Davidson, & Camren (nephew). Beagle showed up 1/2 dressed in his tux already (and the only one to have done so). By 11:00 everyone has arrived. However, in putzing around waiting for some time to pass (waiting for ~ 11:45), we kill too much time and suddenly it is after 12. However, it was fun watching Cammy play video games (and share them with the rest of us). So, this isn't good, starting to get behind already.

Ray and I leave to pick up the in-laws' van (everyone is not fitting in Ray's car). On our way there we figure that the 2 of us would be in and out of JoAnn Fabrics quicker then all of us together. Well, our mission there is to obtain candle holders for the Unity Candle set. Well, what we were looking for and what we got were two different things completely. We were looking for a set of simple taper candle holders and a glass or something dish like thing to hold the large one. What we found instead was a set of stainless steel (I think), ornate, and tall holders designed for this very purpose. It was nice and it wasn't gold, so it was a good match to our wedding. However, the cost was outrageous. If I recall, it was close to $40. Well, the lady at the register hooked us up. We didn't ask or coax her to do what she did. She gave us a 40% off coupon to use on it and told us to be quiet. No problem there. She could have gotten in trouble if it were to have been publicized too much at that time. While we were talking with her, she asked when the wedding was and wouldn't believe that it was to be on this day. She asked if I was crazy. Well, if you have read the rehearsal post, you already know why I was doing this on the wedding day. We didn't know we needed one and only found out at the rehearsal.

From this point, things get interesting. We get to the Denner house and pick up the van. Pickup the guys from Ray's house. Return to the Denner house and are about to leave when Dad asks if we needed the van or not. Well, as it is then discovered, Aunt Mary Grace needs a ride back to the hotel. Thankfully this worked out because I didn't have any time to spare. It was already close to 1:30 and it was going to be approximately a 1/2 hour trip each way. I need to be at the church by 3, at this time we know we're cutting it close. We took the van and all of the required vehicles to the reception hall and return to Ray's. We hit traffic in both directions and it takes more than an hour to make this trip. We get to Ray's at about 2:45. That leaves us only 10 minutes to get ready & get to the church.

The preparation for Beagle was quick, but the rest of us were in shorts & t-shirts still. And that isn't including the time that was going to be required to get the littlest one dressed too. However, Camren worked hard to try to be helpful getting himself dressed. He was so cute too. He saw everyone else just dropping trowel and didn't skip a beat. Off his clothes came too. It is interesting when you get 5 guys and a kid in a room all getting changed at once. Remember that 10 minute time frame that we had, well, that didn't work out.

We didn't get to the church until ~ 3:10. We got there only minutes before the limo with the bride arrived. Thankfully the photographer was great & he did some walking around and taking photos of opportunity. I know this because he snapped some of Jason & I talking by the ready room & some of my dad & I when I was helping him with his button cover. And those are only the ones that I know about. We haven't seen our proofs yet to know what all he took.

So, now everyone is here. Guests are arriving. Isn't it now that you're supposed to be scared/cold feet/second guessing everything? Well, not me. Cool, calm, collected. However, I did have one emotional spurt while I was waiting. It was around the time that I was having my photo taken with my dad. I noticed my cousins Leann and Willie and their families. It was at that point that I had the odd feelings. I say odd, because I don't know how to classify them. I wasn't worried about becoming married, I wasn't worried that I had made a wrong selection, I was thinking, all of this hubbub was about me (on my families side anyway). It isn't very often that my family gets together. I don't see my cousins very often. But, all of a sudden, the realization that we're going to be the absolute center of attention was intimidating. That feeling didn't last long, but I thought it was an odd feeling to have.

Before we get to the actual ceremony, I'd like to break away for a moment to talk about Camren. As most people know, dealing with a 4 year old is usually less than ideal when you are under the stress of a deadline. However, I've got to say, Camren was on his best behavior thru this entire process. He didn't complain once, he was kind & courteous to everyone else that was there, he didn't try to become the center of attention, and always did what he was asked. For that matter, he never spoke back at anyone either. I was amazed. I didn't know what I was getting myself into with having him all day, as Dana was involved in the doings of Angel's side of the party. But I am glad that it worked as it did.

So, hence came the ceremony. Finally saw my mom's walking up to the Unity Candle to light the tapers. That was our cue. So, we emerge from the room just in time to see Ray and Dana already 1/2 way down the isle. Mind you, it is a short isle. The church is a historical landmark and only seats around 150 people. The procession was beautiful and of course, since Camren sat down at the rehearsal, of course he so did again. However, Ray got him straight. At this point, Angel & her dad are starting their walk. I can't possibly explain the excitement that ran over me at that point. She was so beautiful, I don't even have words for it. There was one thing that did surprise me though. Dad is a pretty stern guy until you get to know him. I had thought that this would be once when some emotion would fly. Well, I was wrong. He was softer at that time, but not a hesitation, not a crack in his voice. Everything was just as it was during the rehearsal. However, this is the time when the normalcy of our ceremony ends.

Rev. Pat Malone was officiating our ceremony. His church is pretty non-standard in the Catholic world, which in reality, fit us just fine. And he stared of with class. He dropped the names of Snoop Dog, Madona, and some other Hollywood type's name. Really set the tone of the ceremony when names in pop culture are being used during an introduction. He was saying that religion is not defined by the jewelry that we wear. So, anyway, he then officially begins the event (after the message of intent) with instructions to Angel. She is to submit. However, he does this in such a way as to buffer the blow before it came. He said that most brides over react to what he was about to say and asked her to wait until the explanation was complete. Anyway, he also had instructions for me. He said that I was to give her everything that I am. That sounded pretty simple, I have been doing that already. However, he then quantified that saying that everything included the times that weren't so easy. His example was to attend a flowery event with her instead of a Steelers game. Well, mentally, I said, that wouldn't happen. Angel's not a girly type of girl. Well, not that girly. Then it occurred to me, take it for what he meant, not what he said. Damn! However, I still don't see that as much of an issue, we communicate well and have become very good at compromising when we have to. So, cool, this won't be much of an issue.

So, Rev. Malone, continues on to inform the guests that they have a role and responsibilities in the success of our marriage. At this point, I understood what he was saying and couldn't help but to think of what should we be doing for Cindy. Granted, I wasn't in attendance, but I'm now part of the family. Or, which family member needs to teach Earl a lesson and get it thru his head that he's fucking up? Thankfully, that train of thought didn't last long and I got back on track with the ceremony. So, the guests have instructed to intervene when required to assist us when we're not working as well as we should.

Following the instructions to the parties, he reads a scripture. It was interesting because it was about widows of brothers, their refusal to remarry, and their commitment to one another and the brother's mother. It was different. I don't recall ever hearing that one before. I would tell you what book & verse it came from if I knew, but I don't recall.

At this point I glanced at the cheat sheet in the bible for the ceremony and we're well over 1/2 way thru. We do the Unity Candle lighting, say our vows (we used the canned ones), and we are announced for the first time as husband and wife.

It wasn't until we were down the isle that I was able to notice that we had a standing only crowd. Amazing, of the 180+ RSVPs we got, about 85% of them also attended the ceremony. That really meant a lot to us. Now is when the planning broke down a bit. During the rehearsal, we didn't discuss what would happen once we were outside the church. The wedding party scattered and even Angel & I ended up being separated. We didn't have a formal receiving line, but one happened anyway. I was even yelled at for the first time by my wife for not being on the same side of the sidewalk as her. It was cute.

One of the most memorable events while we were outside, my cousin Leann came out of the church balling her eyes out, not too quietly either, got the crying shake going on and everything. I wasn't sure how to take that. She later told me that she's a wedding crier and not to worry. The look on Kirk's face was priceless as it clearly said, "Dude, don't ask me, I don't know."


At some point the line fades away and we take the opportunity to share a smoke. Everyone found it to be so humorous and cute. I'm not exactly sure why, but they did. We're both smokers and we knew we didn't have time to each have one. Was rational to us. So, we took our pictures in and out of the church. We had a toast before heading to the Jefferson Memorial for more pictures and then stuffed into the limo. During the ride, the flower girl crashed out; Camren was in the corner with our bartenders and Tracey managed to spill her drink on herself. Once at the memorial, we took another group picture & had some additional shots of us alone. By the time we left the memorial, we were already late for our late appearance. When we were cramming back into the limo, I managed to spill Dana's drink all down her front. Oops. We got to the reception at about 6:45 and were not announced until ~7. We were anticipating being announced at 6:30. Oh, well, the way things were going (fun), we really didn't care.

Everyone told us before our big day not to have any misconceptions about what was going to happen at the reception. Well, we didn't think he had expected too much, but in hindsight, we certainly did. The time flew by so quickly that we didn't have an opportunity to visit many of the tables, we felt that every 5 minutes we were being pulled back onto the dance floor, and all we could hope was that everyone in attendance had fun. Thankfully, from the reports that we've received, most everyone had fun.

I have to make note of one event that took place during the reception. The cake cutting. We stole a page out of my cousin's book and instead of smashing the cake into each other we hit each other's #1 support (Best man = Angel, Matron of Honor = me). Dan, thanks for the idea.

Late in the night, it was brought to my attention that I had overlooked one major component of required actions. Thanks to Justin for bringing it to my attention. When I organized the Mother/Son dance, I neglected to include a 2nd track or time to get Steffy on the floor. Therefore, the last dance of the night was danced with her. It wasn't a big deal, we had had plenty with each other by that point. She was worried that Angel might get upset. That she was not.

The only thing I have to say is, a 5 hour reception is not long enough.

For a different perspective on the whole ceremony and reception, check out Jason's blog.

At this point, I think I've written enough. I'm going to close with this. If you are reading this and said, yeah, you didn't talk to me at the reception. We're sorry, we didn't do it intentionally. We'll have to catch up again some other time. Come down to visit or hit us up next time we're in town.

Also, if you are saying where is my thank you card, it is on our to-do list. We didn't forget about them.